When I reflect on the past few months, I notice something.
If you’d have asked me last year where I expected to be heading, my answer would have been very different from what I see in front of me today.
In such a short amount of time, my life has changed drastically.
It’s moments like these when I realise I’ve got it wrong. I am so focused on the future. In fact, too focused.
I don’t doubt that planning and organisation are of crucial importance. But sometimes, we can go far beyond the acceptable amount of planning.
What exactly am I going to be doing in the next few months? What about in 10 years? What will my circumstances be? Who will I be surrounded by? How will I feel? What if I can’t keep up? The list goes on.
So much energy and thought is fed into worrying about what’s to come.
But this future I’m holding on to so tightly probably never will come. Just like the future I perceived in the past did not translate into what I am living today.
You see, these pages I tried to write so thoroughly were never part of my book. Regardless of how long I spent perfecting the handwriting.
The me of today was once a future me; an idea. And they couldn’t be more different.
I may see change as an obstacle, or a deviation from my well thought out plan. I may see it as a failure or a loss or a burden.
But no matter what I want for tomorrow, no matter what I think I need, what is with Allah will undoubtedly be better. His wisdom will always transcend my ignorance.
‘Say, “Never will we be struck except by what Allah has decreed for us; He is our protector.” And upon Allah let the believers rely.’
(Surah Al Taubah: 51)